beatificdreams: (Default)
( Jun. 22nd, 2009 10:31 pm)
This heat has seriously kicked my ever-lovin' tail! I've been exhausted the last few days. Joyfully exhausted, though.

Happiness is constant work. You have to have a commitment to joy. You have to work every day at letting go. You let go of the past and the present, and it leaves you in a place of ultimate perfection. Now. Now is the apex of the symphony. Now is the moment it's supposed to be. It's the moment that your whole life has been working toward. You'd think that being Buddhist-ish for 12(!) years would have taught me to do this almost automatically. Nope. One foot off the rock, and I fall right into the river. SPLOOSH! Just like that. But all it takes is just a bit of awareness to come back.

I laugh every day. I don't (just) laugh over jokes and silliness. I literally laugh out loud because I am so happy to be here. I am so happy to be doing this. I'm so happy I'm alive!

I have a base in me of Destiny. I know that I am where I should be and doing what I should do. When I go through heartache of any kind, I always come back to my faith. I don't necessarily believe in a God, per se, but I have 100% faith in the Universe. The Universe is in constant motion to make everything perfect for you. I spent about 8 days really sad. I literally woke up one day. I saw all the lessons I was meant to learn. I saw how I was going to grow from it. I was awake. More awake than I had been in years.

So I giggle. I dance. I sing. I delight in this life. Not in its people and its things. Not even its happenings. I delight because it is full of magic. I delight because it's amazingness, just how it is.

I am going to the Hindu temple again this week. I have some God-dess worshiping I need to get in. I love Hinduism, because I feel like each deity represents a different aspect of the Universe. All of them represent the whole. If I feel weak in one area, I can spend time working on it with a focus.

Kali, Kali, Kali!

I don't know what the next year will bring. I don't know what the next week will bring. I have a gypsy soul. Free spirited. Things are changing fast. The world and myself, alike. Ha. Isn't it wonderful?


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